Today I have found my peace in song lyrics although I still feel as if I am a bother to people. Today has been 1000% better than the previous weeks. I still feel horrible for the friends I have pushed away as they do mean the world to me. I attempted to push them away as protection from what I was planning to do and I do not know if they would understand that though. Even if they did they might not think of me as the same person instead might see me as a hopeless cause or just insane (which might be possible). I am the sane person I have always been its just sometimes the demons in my mind claw their way out no matter how hard I try to restrain them.
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